Did you know that the first few paragraphs of a short story, book or article can be the most important? If you don't grab a reader's (or editor's) attention right away, they'll often quit and find something else to read. Those first few paragraphs have got to be good! Here is your writing assignment:

Write an attention-grabbing opening (beginning) to a story. It can be true or fiction, about any subject. It should NOT be a complete story-- just the first few paragraphs.

For me, writing a good opening is the hardest part of any story. (The second hardest part is writing the ending. Everything in between is easy!) Here are three quick tips to give you some ideas:

• You could start your story with some action. Instead of a "once-upon-a-time" opening, show us something happening! You might drop us into the middle of a fight, a conversation, or some other action that will get our attention--fast!
• You could start your story with something surprising. The unexpected usually gets people's attention. It might be an old man riding a tricycle, or a kid teaching at a college. If it's unexpected, it often "hooks" readers.
• You could start your story in an interesting place. How about inside the stomach of a whale, or maybe up in your neighbor's tree? If you "put" readers in an interesting place, they'll usually keep reading.

FIRST PLACE Entry by Kim Greene Age 13 I couldn't believe it was happening. My pal of fifteen years was suffering and I couldn't do anything to help him. My dog was dying. He had helped me through my tough teenage years and was there when no one else was. Barkley would ALWAYS listen to whatever was on my mind. At times, I thought he was the only one who loved me. I knew he would have to go sometime, but on my birthday! It just wasn't fair. That's one lesson Barkley had taught me. Life isn't fair. (c)Copyright 1996 Kim Greene All Rights Reserved

Judges' Comments: Kim went slightly over the 200-word limit and misspelled one word ("belive" instead of "believe"), but we all agreed she'd written a compelling opening. Her first line, "I couldn't believe it was happening", hooked us right away. In a few short sentences she communicated her character's pain and established an emotional link with the reader by using a common experience--a birthday, usually a happy time--to sharpen the feeling of emotional conflict. Using contrasts to make a point is an effective writing technique. Several of us felt she could have improved her opening by leaving out the giveaway sentence, "My dog was dying", allowing the reader to figure it out from the name ("Barkley"), or from an explanation at the beginning of the next paragraph. We would advise Kim to work on her use of tenses (is, was, had been), but overall we agreed that her work deserved the First Place prize. Congratulations, Kim!

SECOND PLACE Entry by Joshua Wassung Age 15 Adam stared out the frail little window which was the only thing keeping him and the horrors of the storm outside apart. He watched as the racing wind and pounding rain seemed to form out of the pitch blackness that surrounded the ship, and then spit its fury with force beyond comprehension. Flickers of light flashed all around him, illuminating the monstrous waves threatening to consume the ship's presence. He could feel his stomach lash out at him with each terrible creak. The once strong and majestic cruise ship now seemed no more than a fishing boat bobbing around in the waves. (c)Copyright 1996 Joshua Wassung All Rights Reserved

Judges' Comments: Joshua has already developed a definite writing style, which includes graphic imagery and description. His first sentence sets the stage for a tense, edge-of-your-seat story, and he follows through by describing a scene skillfully crafted to build suspense. He shows a firm grasp of storytelling technique by filling in details layer by layer, sentence by sentence. For instance, in the first sentence we see a boy separated from a violent storm by a "frail" window. In the second sentence we realize this is taking place on a ship. In the third sentence we see that the ship is in mortal danger. Finally we realize it is a cruise ship-- presumably filled with people who had expected fun, not death, on the high seas. As with Kim's story, the contrast/conflict gives the story a nice touch. Joshua's strength in the area of imagery and description, however, can become a weakness when it's carried too far. We would strongly advise Joshua to watch his adjectives and to be careful not to overdramatize. For his fine work, we're happy to award Joshua Second Place. Congratulations!

THIRD PLACE (Tied) Entry by Melissa Dickson, Age 9 My troubles all started when my Dad said, "Let's go on vacation." So here I am, in this stinky car, with my stinky brother, who's eating a stinky baloney sandwich that my mother made. You would think she'd at least take us to McDon-- CRACK! That is when the storm started! (c)Copyright 1996 Melissa Dickson All Rights Reserved

Judges' Comments: Although we had to correct a few misspelled words (i.e."sandwitch"), we all agreed that Melissa wrote an opening that made us want to keep reading. She started with action and put us "in the picture" right away by vividly describing her "stinky" surroundings. She also showed incredible skill for a nine-year-old by including dialogue ("Let's go on vacation."); using word contractions appropriately (who's, she'd); using repetition (stinky-stinky-stinky) to give her narrative a humorous feel; and hardest of all, correctly writing an interrupted sentence: You would think she'd at least take us to McDon-- . Based on all those factors, we felt Melissa had easily earned Third Place. Well done, Melissa!

THIRD PLACE (Tied) Entry by Jeannette Lim, Age 12 The breathing. It tormented me. Through the night I felt something down my neck. Warm but steady. In the darkness I could see something and I paid close attention. But I did not move. There was eye contact and I thought I saw something. Something eerie. A predatory twinkle. (c)Copyright 1996 Jeannette Lim All Rights Reserved

Judges' Comments: Here is a writer who could be our next Stephen King! There was no doubt in any of our minds that Jeannette had crafted an attention-getting paragraph. Like Joshua, she demonstrates a very distinct writing style, something many adult writers work (unsuccessfully) for years to develop. "Graphic", "cryptic" and "unforgettable" were just a few of the adjectives that came up when we discussed her work. Her surprising combination of the words "predatory" and "twinkle" gave us goosebumps. Had Jeannette's entry sounded more like an opening to a story and less like a "teaser" (an excerpt from the middle of a story, designed to grab your attention and get you to buy/read a book), it could have made--or tied for--First or Second Place. Without a doubt it made a lasting impression on all who read it, which is the ultimate compliment to any writer's skill.

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